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Of course, life’s not fair, who ever told you that it was? I have told my kids this a million times. "That’s life", not to put them down or discourage them, but to prepare them for what is to come. You have to work hard to get what you want and sometimes that’s not good enough.

My 16-year-old son came to me the other day upset about something that had happened to him. All his hard work has been resulting in nothing but complaints and discouragement. What is a parent to say or do in a situation likes this? He told me, "Mom, effort means nothing without results!" As soon as it was out of his mouth I wrote it down on a piece of paper, astonished that he had it figured out.

Why put in the work if you are not going to get the ‘at-a-boys’? Why put in the work if it is not going to turn into something great? Our children are being raised in a world where it’s OK to come in second place. (I truly don’t want anyone to miss my meaning. I encourage my kids to do the best they can and I congratulate them on what great effort they have put into it. Whether they get the results they were looking for or not.) That’s just it, I want them to WANT to be the best at what they do. And if they fall short, the congratulation is still there because I know that with all their heart they put their best into it.

Our school system honors every child on the elementary level, sheltering them from a lifetime of disappointment. They will have to learn that life’s not fair. Every child in elementary received a green ribbon at field day, no blue, red, or white ribbons were handed out, just green participation ribbons for everyone. No reason to try harder next year. No reason to improve oneself. Every child in the elementary also got every award given at the awards program. Eagle Effort and Citizenship were given to each and every kid. What makes the well behaved child want to be good next year when the one that has been sent out of the room all year for trouble making is receiving the same piece of paper. No special recognition for those that give it their best.

Life’s not fair. Not in school, not in work. This transfers to adult life. Why push hard at work when there is no raise in sight? A little ‘job well done’ from the boss goes a long way. A little appreciation and recognition pushes us to be our best. The world has come to accepting mediocrity. This is not OK. "It’s OK, they’re just better than us!" WHO SAYS THAT! Especially to our kids. Shame on you!

Push your children to be the best. There is nothing wrong with that. I call it good parenting.