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Since it was just Fathers Day, I thought I would revive an old story about my granddaddy Tarver who had some pretty definite ideas about how things should be. He also was the father figure for me after I was 8 years old and my father was ‘fathering’ the son of the woman he married after the war. For one thing, Granddaddy thought women should be ladies and men should be gentlemen, always. Class had its place and people should stay within their class. It was the same about people of color and it didn’t matter if that color was black or brown and it had nothing to do with those people not having respect, it was all about people staying within their own well defined boundaries. Granddaddy was born in the late 1800’s so you must understand that these ways were all he knew.

He had a Magnolia service station, a filling station they were called back in the mid thirties. The great depression of the 30’s ended his former business. Filling station was a good name for what he did in his business because he filled up gas tanks, put oil where and when it was needed and filled tires with air and put water in the radiator or whatever needed it and the air, water, and windshield wipe was all free. He could even quench your thirst from any number of different kinds of soda water or (sody water) he called it. There were these great small bottles of Coca Cola, Root Beer, Nesbitts Orange, Dr. Pepper and Chocolate drink of some kind. Ice was brought to his station each day and plunked down into the drink cooler and if there was a bit of room and it was after the 4th of July you’d likely see one or two Black Diamond watermelons chilling there. Do you remember when you never bought a watermelon without the vendor plugging it for you to taste?

Granddaddy did give service to every customer and credit to a chosen few although he never ‘put anything on credit’ in his life. If a customer drove in and just wanted the tires checked or some water in the radiator he got it for them with a smile and if that is all they wanted he just thanked them and said “Come back soon.” If they wanted gas it was a given that for the price of however much gas they bought they also got the full service of checking everything for free.

Granddaddy never thought that he should be tipped for something that he felt just went with the job like service. So, when he would take Grandmother and me in the evenings after he closed at 6 P.M. to Shelton’s Drive In for a juicy pig sandwich and a thick chocolate malt, he wouldn’t leave a tip for the car hop. It really embarrassed Grandmother but he was adamant. He would just say in that tone that meant the discussion was over, “Now Pearl!” Then he’d tell her to run her business which was the house etc and that he would tend to spending the money. Case closed. I think every once in awhile he would relent and leave a quarter tip. He wasn’t a mean or penurious man, he just felt that fair was fair and that serving the food was the car hop’s job just like putting gas in a car was his. He didn’t expect extra and he didn’t want to give it either.

This was an ongoing discussion for my grandparents and he pointed out to her once that at their favorite Sunday place to eat, the Piccadilly Cafeteria, that they didn’t get a tip for dishing up his Sunday dinner so why should Neva the car hop.

Credit was a dirty word to Granddaddy. He extended it on a monthly basis like I mentioned to a few people he trusted and a few he just felt sorry for and he charged no interest. He would never let my grandmother buy any thing on time as it was called back then, I guess that was layaway because not many big stores had charge accounts then.

However when charge accounts and something called a CHARG-A-CARD came into being at our best department store in Beaumont, The White House Dry Goods Company, Grandmother applied for and got one and it was ages before she told him but she paid her account in full every month.

Granddaddy was a pocket watch man. He owned and wore every day a gold Hamilton watch that was hooked by a nice gold chain from the belt loop on his Dickies brand Khaki pants and into the watch pocket there and on Sundays into his suit pants. Not many men except maybe professionals like doctors or lawyers wore wrist watches and Granddaddy was somewhat suspect of them. I think he called men who wore watches a dandy or a fop.

I think if my Granddaddy had lived past the early sixties and would have seen the ad in a magazine that I saw he would have resigned the human race. The ad was for condoms, for heavens sake. Now I realize this is the 21st century and a lot has changed and I have noted plenty of it but would you think there would be need for a whole store just for condoms? Well in Austin there is such and it’s called the Austin Condom Boutique!

Then there was the time Ed Sullivan kissed Sammie Davis Jr. on television. I think of the things he’d see now and I think about body piercings on men and women, tattoo’s, men in earrings, no matter which ear. The haircuts of today and the mode of dress for young women all of these things would have had him spinning like a top.

If my granddaddy had known one day his very own grandson would have hair longer than his mother’s I think he would have wanted to disown him or that his skate boarding great great grandson wore his pants so low that a big wind would have rendered him naked! The first time I brought my husband Pat to meet my granddaddy was in 1954 and Pat Smith (the Austin boy) had duck tails and a sort of Elvis curl hanging over his forehead. Granddaddy took a look at Pat, reached in his pocket and pulled out $2 and said, “How do you do son, now go get a haircut!” Even though this beginning was a little rough between Granddaddy and Pat they quickly grew to love each other like blood relatives. Granddaddy has been gone for 48 years but I think of him every Fathers Day and this year is no different, Granddaddy was no renaissance man but he was an extraordinary man and we loved him.